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The gentle art of kissing explained. Useful tips for beginners and experienced practitioners alike.

You may be the smoothest operator ever to grace a singles barstool, you may have the looks an extra on The O.C. and the sensitivity of the Dalai Lama, but if you're terrible at tonsil hockey or a let down at the lip-lock, then you're just not gonna make it in the romance stakes.

According to John L. Ferri, author of Sex in the Romance: A Review of Romantic Encounters of the Close Kind: "Kissing is an art and a highly individual and personal expression of affection and love." Scientists tell us that kissing signals our brains to produce oxytocin, a hormone that gives us that gooey-all-over feeling we experience when making mouth music. If done properly it'll make you as horny as hell and is a bloody good indication of how you'll be in the sack.

So it's very important to get it right. Nothing turns a prospective bed mate off faster than a lousy kisser, such as the "Niagara Falls", who produces enough slobber to wash your car, or the "electric eel", whose tongue travels so far down your throat it begins to choke you. While everyone must develop their own technique, here are a few general pointers to ensure you keep them coming back for more.

Good breath is essential. OK so a taste of mouthwash is a dead giveaway you were anticipating a bit of nookie, but that beats the hell out of ashtray breath.

A bit of sensitivity goes a long way. Your smooching partner is probably not going to tell you how they like to be kissed, so you'll have to use trial and error (hopefully not too much error). Experiment with taking and following the lead, a mixture of tenderness and aggressiveness and kissing different parts of the body and face. Be playful and have fun!

Remember a good kiss is its own reward. Just enjoy it and don't get too caught up in thinking about what it might lead to - just let nature take its course.

Charles Cuninghame is a website copywriter in Sydney, Australia, and an online dating enthusiast.

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